No thanks!

When I look back on poor decisions made in pain or emotional turmoil I say, “No thanks”.

From a point of clarity, “No thanks”.

My head is on straight now, so “No thanks “.

I may be alone, but “No thanks”.

From my true self, with courage and conviction. I say again to you, to this, or that – ” No thanks!”

To schedule a Counsel4Living session in the Chicago land  area (Women, Couples and Families). Reach out to:

They don’t have to like it

I am so glad I grew up in the era where a persons self-worth was not determined by likes or retweets. Where self-confidence was established in the home environment. Acceptance came from people who knew you, literally knew you, not virtually . When a handful of quality relationships could carry a person a lifetime. No one really has hundreds of friends. The notion is laughable. Who are we if we check social media more times a day than we engage face to face conversations in a month? Do you have three people you could call who would come to your home in a crisis? Would you be comfortable with them seeing you just as you are? No hair and makeup or barbers cut and shave. Can you have a phone conversation with them?

What is the source of your self-confidence? It comes from within, not external validation. Eventually external validation is good, we all need it. Being supported and understood is comforting. In the event that does not occur just when you need it. What are you working with in your inner man? Can it carry you, alone.

“I will lift up my eyes to the hills—
From whence comes my help?

My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2 NKJV


One of many

imageWhen you look out of your personal lens at the world, remember you’re one of many. So don’t take yourself so seriously. “It” can get done without you.

About Marriage

Recently a close friend asked for my input on a class assignment. The question was “What is your view of marriage?” The interviewees needed to be those married five, ten or twenty plus years. I fall into the last category. This week I’m sharing my response to the question with intent to support someone who may be struggling with conflict in their marriage. Here was my response:

“I’ve been married twenty-seven years and I think marriage is a covenant made before God for a lifelong partnership. When two decide to commit to the journey of loving, learning and growing, the outcome can be a mature comfortable union that others want to emulate.”

If it’s a bad week, month or year in your marriage, you’re not alone. All couples experience trying times. Try not to make a life-altering decision in the heat of anger. Step back, say a prayer and get some help tomorrow if the two of you can’t work it out yourselves.image

Connect with for help in the Chicagoland area.

Busy body

Sometimes doing so much doesn’t yield any answers we seek.image It just busys (is that a word 👀 lol) the body. Remember- we are human beings, not human doings. The mind transforms circumstances, not excessive activity. Consider sitting still long enough to change your mind, then transformation will follow. Take it easy breezy :).


imageEverything doesn’t have to be so complicated. If you need support-call out, reach out, or lift your hands to be picked up. Move whatever works on you and let the rest unfold. #DoYourPart.

It’s a good day to start fresh

imageIt’s a good day to start fresh on “whatever”. The month of August is a transitional month. Mornings and evenings feel like fall in many places, students are preparing  for school and parents too. Change is totally in the air. So why not ride the momentum by applying this energy for transition to your life where it fits. Maybe you don’t have kids going to school, but you’ve meant to take a class in something that interests you. How about that home makeover project you’ve been thinking about? You could start small and make a change. Are you a creative? Did you start that latest project? What about your relationships, are they working? Can you effect a change in them for the better?  Take small steps, or crawl, just please don’t sit idle. Afterall, who should steer the handle bars of your life?